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Essays In Love

Essays In Love

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How could they be divine as we had hoped when they have the bad taste to approve of someone like us?

The feeling is more along the lines of, “I wish I could be attracted to this person because I know I could probably make them like me if I tried hard enough. Is there not in every coup de foudre a certain willful exaggeration of the qualities of the beloved, an exaggeration which distracts us from our habitual pessimism and focuses our energies on someone in whom we can believe in a way we have never believed in ourselves? It is one of the ironies of love that it is easiest confidently to seduce those to whom we are least attracted. I mean, prior to this book, I thought indulging in such thoughts was a surefire way of diagnosing an unhappy relationship.Alain De Botton encapsulates his many experiences in love in one relationship between a 'fictional' man and woman. De Botton discusses the role of beauty in a relationship and how we tend to see our lovers as beautiful even if others may not necessarily agree. I will love you not just for your wit and talent and beauty, but simply because you are you, with no strings attached. The book charts the progress of a love affair from the first kiss to argument and reconciliation, from intimacy and tenderness to the onset of anxiety and heartbreak. This book is for those readers wanting to be instantly immersed in the story and to learn or have someone share some universal experiences we al have in relationships.

As in a novel, there are characters and realistic settings, but these are blended in with a host of more abstract ideas. If someone thinks I am shy, I will probably end up shy, if someone thinks me funny, I am likely to keep cracking jokes. When Chloe and the protagonist (I suppose his name is Alain — we are never completely sure of that) first met in a chapter titled “ Romantic Fatalism”, De Botton wrote about our motivations in falling in love as a desire to invent a destiny so as to spare ourselves the anxiety that no one has written our story or assured our loves, that we are eager to locate inside another person a perfection that eludes within ourselves, and ultimately “ hope to maintain a precarious faith in our species. I start with self-hatred and blame myself for something not working out–either not being attractive enough or smart enough or just enough in any capacity of the word.The structure of the story isn’t unusual, but what lends the book its interest is the extraordinary depth with which the emotions involved in the relationship are analysed. full of short paragraphs that make the book smooth and wickedly addictive to read, the genuine and honest fears,highs,lows and confusion that comes with any relationship along it's timeline just felt so relatable and De Botton masterly hands us some gems of advice and thoughts to consider about love. This book is worth reading because De Botton is very good at analysing each stage of his relationship with Chloe and it is fascinating to see Botton's character laid down in detail.

I oscillate a lot between the two until I come to a sort of acceptance that nothing will ever happen and kind of sort of move on–which is, indeed, what happens to the narrator. He never disappoints and the titles of his books are usually clear and very indicative of what you're hoping a book will be. The oasis complex is never a complete delusion: the man in the desert does see something on the horizon.

This is the first of Alain de Botton's writing that I've read and it has made me interested in readinf more. I’d first discovered its possibilities when reading Montaigne’s Essays, where the author takes the reader around some highly thought-provoking philosophical ideas, in a tome that is intimate, digressive and charming. There’s an essay on how uncomfortable it can be to disagree with a lover’s taste in shoes and a lengthy discussion about the role of guilt in love.

I just wanted something a bit happier, this is maybe a more truthful look at love, more realistic, less romantic.

The book's success has much to do with its beautifully modeled sentences, its wry humor, its unwavering deadpan respect for its reader's intelligence. I do the same and I didn’t realise it was a thing everyone did (again, I need to force this book onto someone to DISCUSS).

  • Fruugo ID: 258392218-563234582
  • EAN: 764486781913
  • Sold by: Fruugo

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